This title is actually literal, nothing to do with the song...

Common Tests are over and it all ended really badly with Physics, but I don't really care (at least until Promos) as long as I get to spend the next week or so pretending that I'm having my holidays. :D I realised that if I were still in IP1/2, I would be having my holidays extended by two weeks. Lucky buggers. All the same, I'm glad I got to enjoy those two years.

I'm typing this while waiting for the Biology students to get done with their paper (17 00 hours). It's only about 15 20 now. I'm downloading Maplestory on the computer while waiting and it's taking... just about forever. >< *laughs meanly*

This entry is of absolutely no purpose except to cure me of my boredom as I forgot to bring my iPod today, and I didn't bring a book either. Plus, I'm also surprisingly sick of playing games on Miniclip. Sushi buffet tomorrow, hopefully. ♥ I am SO going to get Eclipse after that!

This is sick.

I don't understand why I have (throughout my whole life) to keep on questioning the nature of "friendship" and what constitutes "friendship". What do friends do for you? What don't friends do for you? I don't suppose there's a clear-cut answer.

Take this as an example, think about it and be really sweet to get back to me on this issue. (:

If your friend was not present for an event they were supposed to attend (i.e. you are attending it as well, and you have noticed his/her absence), would you (as a friend, not by default) text her or call her to find out her whereabouts and why she wasn't present?

I never had to question such an act before, because most of my friends and I have been doing this routinely (i.e. if a friend is absent, wait, then text the friend, wait, then call the friend) for the past few years. However, it is apparent that I am... largely mistaken; that this should be questioned as there are some individuals out there who don't do it, for whatever reason it is.

Of course, the friend who is absent has to take upon his/her shoulders that it is his/her responsibility to be present, and not his/her friends' responsibilities to make sure that he/she is. But that really is besides the point, isn't it. My current concern would be that in the case that the friend were absent, what would you do?

I don't know why it matters, because it really shouldn't. People lie because they're afraid of telling the truth. It's as simple as that. Fear has to be inspired by someone or something; it really isn't their fault that they're scared. It's mine. Have I, perhaps, proved myself unworthy of the truth? Have I, perhaps, reacted badly to truths meant to be untold in the past?

Are they so afraid that the revelation would lead them to such excruciatingly painful circumstances that they withold it and spin a cock and bull story to feed others, in the belief that lying would lead them to a better end?

If you are so ashamed of what you're doing, why do it in the first place? Does it sit upon your conscience as much as it does mine when you've been found out? Do you wonder what it feels like to be me?

Was it your first instinct? To tell an untruth? Was it? Did you do it, thinking that I would never find out? That must have been the worst thing to do in a public space. So wide, so open! Even your fabrications couldn't shield you.

I would've been happy for you. My friends know that. I'm not so bitter as yet to curse you for something I've never found.

My saving grace is that if I ever did anything to wreck my record, I don't remember it. And I have good friends; friends who can make me forget about all of this because your lack of faith is just insignificant in comparison. At least till I'm alone sitting in front of this space.

So what's yours?