Some random photos because I'm putting off studying (whatever is not Math). I'm almost done with the topics for Pure Math, but the (one and only) blue pen I use for the subject is half-dead and it's really not very fun to turn the nib a few degrees at the time to see which face produces the most ink. I need to get new pens!


This is Joey on Friday morning, when the National Anthem was playing waaaay too loud over the system.


My bruise a few days after donating blood. Hmm... it really does look as if I've been abused.


This is the burn I sustained from baking on Wednesday night. Blame it on the camera, but it looks like a dried, deep cut. Right now, it just looks like a darker patch of skin.


Why an egg? It was the closest thing to me that one could use to compare with.

For those of you who have not been seeing me online recently and are wondering why, it's because I now go to sleep at approximately 9-12 (depending on whether it's the weekend) and wake at 2 30 - 8 (again, depending on the day). As most people are not awake at 2 30, it's really no wonder that you don't see me.

For those of you who see this and (for some absolutely crucial reason) wish to chat with me really badly, I'll be back at approximately 7 pm to write my H3 essay.

Things I think you should know about my life that happened yesterday:

1. Saw an Energizer Bunny mascot on TVmobile when they were talking about stocks. The huge, pink, drum-hitting creature totally made my day. :D
   
2. I went home and baked chocolate chip cookies slightly smaller than your face. (:
3. I burnt myself while baking them. It hurt like crazy.
   

I should have pictorial evidence of the last two, but I'm a little lazy. I'll actually have to go find my camera first. Heh.

It did make me think about... branding though. Excruciating pain. -_- Sick, but I have this theory that there's no point in stopping yourself from thinking about something because if you do, the likelihood is that you already know what you're going to think. So anyway, if you ever burn yourself, toothpaste works. Tried and tested!

And I just found out that someone with a Mac really likes my blog (statcounter says so!), although I'm not sure who. Oh well!

Last afternoon, I embarked on a (not-so-exciting) adventure where I attempted to make mini pretzels.




Interestingly enough, they taste more like scones!



(Both images from Wikipedia)

Ah well! Now my family and I can have prezcones for breakfast. They are actually shaped like pretzels you know...

I just spoke with an acquaintance of mine due to his very controversial sub-nick and the conversation drove me up and against the feminist wall. So for those who want to know, yes, doing H3 literature with some references to feminism and the construct of the female body does indeed make one more passionate about the subject.

His sub-nick goes something like this, "Priorities in life now... and lastly to get a good faithful gf". Personally, I find it very intriguing that finding "love" (if we can call it that, which I will argue that we cannot) is his "last" priority, considering he is already 22 and (if I am not wrong) has not been in a steady relationship since he was 17/18... but that is not the issue.

What I am concerned with is the fact that he wants to "get" a "good" and "faithful" girlfriend. Firstly, one does not GET a girlfriend. This is not the the supermarket. You cannot just obtain one with the mere snap of your fingers. Perhaps you "seek" or you "find", words which indicate that a search ought to take place, that there must be some effort on your part. (Out of curiosity, did you notice that when I am somewhat annoyed, I switch to direct address?)

Secondly, do not the words "good" and "faithful" (especially put together) remind you of a pet dog? I have a good and faithful pet dog whose name is Sam. That would be much more appropriate in a sentence. Such words, that in any other context would be said in praise, seem almost derogatory when used in reference to one's girlfriend in this age. They connote submissiveness and a fragile, delicate nature that speaks dependency on the girl's part. This overtly chauvinistic perspective is not something to be tolerated in a century marked by the emancipatory movements of women long suppressed.

Thirdly, shouldn't there be an emphasis on mutual relationships between partners nowadays? Saying that he wants such a girlfriend as the above-mentioned is equivalent to my saying I want a "strong, handsome man who will provide for my family" - arguably unrealistic and comparatively of so much less import. Isn't the personality of one's partner of greater significance than their function? My take on his "priority" in life is that he placing the usefulness of his ideal girlfriend over her personality or defining characteristics. This leads me to assume that if her angelic goodness or her faithfulness (In what? The relationship? His abilities?) were to expire, that he would no longer consider her eligible to be his girlfriend.

On a marginally related note, it ticks me off when guys (and girls) speak of their future partners as they do commodities - that they can be defined in terms of their precise content. These people are so presumptuous and arrogant that it sickens me. Perhaps even commodities are treated with more respect; when you purchase a "good" product, at least you are paying for it and thus acknowledging its quality. It is natural for one to have certain expectations of the individual they might be spending the rest of their life with, but does anyone ever speak (or even consider) the sacrifice that they would be willing to make for said individual? If you want the guy that does not smoke, what are you willing to give up in return? Will you part with your materialistic wants? If you want the boyfriend that pampers you with gifts, what will you do for him? Will you give in to his sexual desires?

I'll tell you a secret. I'd like it if my future boyfriend were interesting, and I'm willing to deal with an unstable relationship, marked with the (more than) occasional un-returned phone call, the constant break ups and (perhaps) make ups... In return, I'll get the spontaneity of it all, the epitome of change, the love of adventure.

So how much are you willing to give up?

On the odd day, I think I can taste alcohol in my mouth, even though I have not drunk since Saniah and Arthi's birthday party...

I want to drop my steel heart into a large pot of caramelized pineapples.

Goodnight folks. I'm bushed.

I just read a poem (I believe composed by my brother) which made my right eyebrow go so high I would fit right into a cartoon...

Let me quote a stanza. The title of the poem is "She".

" has this soft white skin,
I daren't touch lest I tint,
so delicate it could be,
cut with the hilt of a flint "

What are the things that call out to you?

Here are a few things that come to mind:

1. He is thirteen. It is not bad poetry for a thirteen year old.
2. Why is he, at age thirteen, in a single sex school, writing about a girl?
3. Why is he talking about touching the girl... at all?
   
4. What is his purpose in saying that her skin "could be cut with the hilt of a flint"?!

I would like to believe that he did not think through that piece of poetry carefully... especially the last two lines. I would like to believe he does not have:

1. Sadistic desires
2. Imminent wishes to draw blood from this girl

I also wonder if he is aware of the innuendo and phallic connotations behind the lines (not previously mentioned), "I want to fulfill, Till her heart is full and swaying".

As an elder sister, I have to admit that I really do not wish to see him grow up (so fast). Much as I wish he would mature in his mentally and physically, I would rather he stayed unknowing or at least continue to be apathetic towards the opposite sex till a later age.

I do not have the largest affinity with my siblings, but at the same time, as an eighteen-year-old that has gathered experience from the world way above her head, I feel the need to protect them (him really, because my sister is not yet engaged in such trysts). It seems wrong for my little brother (evidently not so little anymore) to be dipping in the pool of love and relationships. Perhaps I am also motivated by selfishness, because I am aware of the way boys/men-in-relationships think. And the mere thought of him having such... an appetite (to put it euphemistically) almost disgusts me.

HE IS ONLY THIRTEEN!





He cannot even watch NC-16 movies yet... He cannot be coveting (a) girl(s) at thirteen!

After so long, when I thought I'd be able to express everything I wanted on a public domain, I realised that some things are better left for diaries. (: 'Specially when it's more of a miasma of jumbled emotions than rational, straight-lined thoughts.

When I think in circles, I sometimes wonder if I should apply a magnetic and an electric field of equal potential across my ears. When that happens (depending on the direction of the fields) particles will begin to move in a straight line instead. Or perhaps it's more like light... which means I should allow my thoughts to undergo polarization.

Did you know that stationary waves are formed from the superposition of two waves of equal frequency and amplitude, traveling at the same speed but in opposition direction? Stationary waves form pretty graphs.

For the day where mere mortals
Find themselves conquering the Will of God.

When that little voice at the back of your mind asks you if you're jealous,

What do you say?

Here is your self-proclaimed war fodder for the battle against Ants and Mosquitoes.

My laptop is making funny noises as it... exhales. I think perhaps an ant or two got caught in the air vents somewhere...

I hate ants. ):

I have ants on my table, under my table, in my kitchen, in my living room, in my bedroom, ON MY BED. I really do not taste so good, please go away.

On second thought, perhaps I should stop using grapefruit/satsuma body wash/polish. Eep.

All the same, I think it's been a good day today. :D

Out with Chuyun and the German boys, Carli and Jonathan, after National Day Celebrations today. Please bear with me as I wax lyrical in the rest of this entry. (:

One of the things I found most amazing about the boys was their eyes. Carli has irises of a light brown, almost ochre, shade while Joni has them in a sharp, clear blue. There is something so absolutely mesmerizing about each of them (the eyes) that I just couldn't stop staring. They are so honest and open that it's as if you could see right through them and into their soul. The longer I looked, the more I felt as if I was not just looking at them, but seeing each nuance of character in their crisp, unaltered nature.

With eyes like that, there is nothing to hide behind. There is no darkness to weave riddles in your ear, no gelid whispers of uncertainty to wash away the truth or that bespeaks lies. There is nothing to fear; there is safety in those eyes. You are appraised by man in his place, not man riding the currents of God's wind, judging as if he were God Himself. And this, Chuyun, is Carli's answer. This is what I see in their souls.

Such is an aspect of humanity in its perfection.

And today, I decided that I'll dive head-first into the soul of the universe, because neither my head nor my heart can be silenced.

If need be, I will break my own heart.

You know, what really sucks about everyone going through the lets-not-go-online phase is that I find that I can't attempt to get help online when I need it.

I can't even begin to voice how much that annoys me because all these people end up not checking/not bothering to reply their text messages either. Furthermore, even if they do, have you ever tried getting help for a Math/Chemistry question through text? It takes at least 5 messages back and forth before all the information required is accurately conveyed.

It doesn't help that my primary source of help for Physics in the JC1 year decided a few months back to no longer reply text messages or pick up calls.

I know that since I'm dependent on the help of others, I should just feel glad when/if they reply me since they have no obligation to do so, but at the same time, it's not as if I do not help others when they require it. Doesn't anyone else think that at least some form of reciprocation is due?

Whatever. Back to Permutations and Combinations.

I think it's important that we learn to live in the present, to throw ourselves head-first into every single thing we do. At this age, none of us have anything to lose. After all, if one chooses to chase after a dream and find themselves losing things in the process, perhaps those were not so important after all. Anything worth holding on to has to want to hold you back.